Serious Question: Why do kids quit wrestling?
Quote from Dakota Grappler on September 27, 2021, 7:33 amI have thought about this question a lot over the years, and want to hear what parents and coaches have to say about it... I do know I could write many paragraphs on my understanding and maybe even a small book on the topic. Have we changed our perspective? Have we learned from mistakes? Can we learn?
.. a topic very near to my heart! A while back I remember reading a study, I believe it was the Michigan Youth Sports Committee that did a study on this very topic. They found that 70% of kids are done with competitive sports by the time they reach the age of 12. I don't know about you but I find that is a significant number.
The question becomes why. Why would 70% of kids, at the age of 12, be done with competitive sports? Their findings were that first of all sports stop being "FUN". Whether we realize it or not, participation in sports is a recreational and social activity. Does competition takes the fun out of wrestling for a lot of kids?
Second, too much pressure from adults turns kids off. That pressure can be from Daddy, Mommy, or coaches. Too often we adults turn a fun activity into a high-stress and competitive one. Are adults setting the standard of success too high?
Of course, there are other reasons but these two are the most prominent to start this conversation out.
I have thought about this question a lot over the years, and want to hear what parents and coaches have to say about it... I do know I could write many paragraphs on my understanding and maybe even a small book on the topic. Have we changed our perspective? Have we learned from mistakes? Can we learn?
.. a topic very near to my heart! A while back I remember reading a study, I believe it was the Michigan Youth Sports Committee that did a study on this very topic. They found that 70% of kids are done with competitive sports by the time they reach the age of 12. I don't know about you but I find that is a significant number.
The question becomes why. Why would 70% of kids, at the age of 12, be done with competitive sports? Their findings were that first of all sports stop being "FUN". Whether we realize it or not, participation in sports is a recreational and social activity. Does competition takes the fun out of wrestling for a lot of kids?
Second, too much pressure from adults turns kids off. That pressure can be from Daddy, Mommy, or coaches. Too often we adults turn a fun activity into a high-stress and competitive one. Are adults setting the standard of success too high?
Of course, there are other reasons but these two are the most prominent to start this conversation out.
Quote from Jrocket on September 27, 2021, 10:44 amI would agree with those reasons. I also have seen (Not just in wrestling) that when people/kids quit a sport when they stop winning as much as they used to. Example being: person dominating a class then moving up a class and not dominating so they quit. As I have heard the saying from some coaches, "Kids don't burn out or quit when they are winning."
It seems like a stretch, but around this area (South Dakota) there isn't always a good transition through the middle school years as far as competition/training. I know Sioux Falls middle schoolers have to ride a bus to the high school and the high school starts practice about a half hour before they get there. Maybe the lack of help or guidance drops some off.
Just my two cents to help some discussion.
I would agree with those reasons. I also have seen (Not just in wrestling) that when people/kids quit a sport when they stop winning as much as they used to. Example being: person dominating a class then moving up a class and not dominating so they quit. As I have heard the saying from some coaches, "Kids don't burn out or quit when they are winning."
It seems like a stretch, but around this area (South Dakota) there isn't always a good transition through the middle school years as far as competition/training. I know Sioux Falls middle schoolers have to ride a bus to the high school and the high school starts practice about a half hour before they get there. Maybe the lack of help or guidance drops some off.
Just my two cents to help some discussion.
Quote from lace em up on September 27, 2021, 11:25 amInteresting question. Why do some kids quit wrestling? I believe a lot of young kids are trying it out, along with a lot of other sports, to see what "clicks" for them. That's okay. Not everyone has the personality or physical attributes to be a wrestler, basketball player, high jumper, sprinter, etc. Dabbling in a variety of sports as a youngster is a great way to open their eyes to something that they might not have tried otherwise. Hopefully in those early years, and along the way, they develop friendships and feel a sense of community.
Wrestling, specifically, we all know to be a very tough, competitive sport. One cannot coast on talent alone for very long if they don't also put in the work. Wrestling is more physical than most all other sports. If conditioning isn't in tune, you'll see a kid run out of gas and struggle for air. For some young kids, this can be very frightening, tears fall, parents yell in noisy gyms, overstimulation can occur. On the other hand, if in baseball you strike out, yes, you feel bad, but you don't feel physically pushed to your limit. I believe it takes a very special kind of "stick-to-it-iveness" to be a wrestler.
I believe we as a wrestling community should do what we can to support our local wrestling teams. Attend high school wrestling matches, volunteer at your local youth tournament, recognize the wrestlers when we're out and about and ask them how they're doing and provide constant encouragement. They're not seeing a lot of attention from national or even local media on wrestling, so we need to be the ones to fill in the gap and let them know that we see them.
My two cents.
Interesting question. Why do some kids quit wrestling? I believe a lot of young kids are trying it out, along with a lot of other sports, to see what "clicks" for them. That's okay. Not everyone has the personality or physical attributes to be a wrestler, basketball player, high jumper, sprinter, etc. Dabbling in a variety of sports as a youngster is a great way to open their eyes to something that they might not have tried otherwise. Hopefully in those early years, and along the way, they develop friendships and feel a sense of community.
Wrestling, specifically, we all know to be a very tough, competitive sport. One cannot coast on talent alone for very long if they don't also put in the work. Wrestling is more physical than most all other sports. If conditioning isn't in tune, you'll see a kid run out of gas and struggle for air. For some young kids, this can be very frightening, tears fall, parents yell in noisy gyms, overstimulation can occur. On the other hand, if in baseball you strike out, yes, you feel bad, but you don't feel physically pushed to your limit. I believe it takes a very special kind of "stick-to-it-iveness" to be a wrestler.
I believe we as a wrestling community should do what we can to support our local wrestling teams. Attend high school wrestling matches, volunteer at your local youth tournament, recognize the wrestlers when we're out and about and ask them how they're doing and provide constant encouragement. They're not seeing a lot of attention from national or even local media on wrestling, so we need to be the ones to fill in the gap and let them know that we see them.
My two cents.
Quote from WrestleMma185 on September 28, 2021, 9:07 amThe transition from youth to middle school is a huge problem in this state (or at least the area I am in). Unless you are a committed youth wrestler, there are very little avenues to pursue wrestling in the middle schools or ones that make it easier for kids to participate.
The transition from youth to middle school is a huge problem in this state (or at least the area I am in). Unless you are a committed youth wrestler, there are very little avenues to pursue wrestling in the middle schools or ones that make it easier for kids to participate.
Quote from CoachGannon on October 26, 2021, 12:02 pmI believe there are many reasons why kids quit and Top 2 would be exactly what has been stated above, #1 being lack of middle school/JV competition- Need more state sanctioned events for our middle school and JV athletes( Regions, State ect). They Should not be punished for finding outside events to compete at because our state offers very few-( now not eligible to wrestle varsity spot if kid in front of them gets injured. not able to compete with team if team qualifies for state duals ect.)
I think parental pressure that some parents put on their kids is another huge reason students quit- I think it is necessary to push a student athlete but not to the point where they are miserable , not because they no longer like the sport but rather the pressure, fear and consequences of losing their parents put on them.
I also feel some athletes quit because they know that this will never make a varsity spot. I really like entertaining the Idea of having 16 man region tournaments and each school can enter 2 student athletes at each weight. Some schools may have 2 state placing wrestlers at a weight class and one of them will never see a varsity tournament. I understand the concern some people have about power house teams consuming a lot of the medalist but at the end of the day the best wrestlers at each weight class should be on the podium- When someone has nothing to strive for other then a JV spot its hard to stay committed to such a demanding sport.
I believe there are many reasons why kids quit and Top 2 would be exactly what has been stated above, #1 being lack of middle school/JV competition- Need more state sanctioned events for our middle school and JV athletes( Regions, State ect). They Should not be punished for finding outside events to compete at because our state offers very few-( now not eligible to wrestle varsity spot if kid in front of them gets injured. not able to compete with team if team qualifies for state duals ect.)
I think parental pressure that some parents put on their kids is another huge reason students quit- I think it is necessary to push a student athlete but not to the point where they are miserable , not because they no longer like the sport but rather the pressure, fear and consequences of losing their parents put on them.
I also feel some athletes quit because they know that this will never make a varsity spot. I really like entertaining the Idea of having 16 man region tournaments and each school can enter 2 student athletes at each weight. Some schools may have 2 state placing wrestlers at a weight class and one of them will never see a varsity tournament. I understand the concern some people have about power house teams consuming a lot of the medalist but at the end of the day the best wrestlers at each weight class should be on the podium- When someone has nothing to strive for other then a JV spot its hard to stay committed to such a demanding sport.
Quote from thehardway on November 3, 2021, 9:20 amI think the amount of variables is too high to have an exact formula for what makes a kid quit wrestling. I do believe in general that tons of support from family, friends, and coaches instead of pressure is a likely candidate to keeping a good athlete competing.
I think the amount of variables is too high to have an exact formula for what makes a kid quit wrestling. I do believe in general that tons of support from family, friends, and coaches instead of pressure is a likely candidate to keeping a good athlete competing.
Quote from WellArmed on November 4, 2021, 12:29 amIMO, in wrestling the reason a lot of kids quit is
(and I want to focus on elementary--that's where I see our club losing the most wrestlers)1.) Fear of losing, fear of not measuring up, seeing "no chance to be at or near the top" or unreasonable expectations that they feel they should be accomplishing but can't. Where do they get these expectations? Often its a "natural" expectation that comes from themselves or from parents/coaches. Even if it doesn't come from parents/coaches, kid still FEEL that they are to be meeting these expectations. If I could coach youth wrestling over again, THAT would what I would remind kids of CONSTANTLY--- If we are working hard, and doing things in the practice room etc to get better, we have done our job. We can't control the wins and losses. We can control the preparation and effort only. If we can somehow get elementary kids to understand/buy into that train of thought, we'd lose less wrestlers. Personally, here, we lose the most kids in middle to late elementary. I can tell when kids are candidates to quit---I can see the pressure to win that they feel, and the let down/agony when they lose. And again, I want to reiterate that I think it comes from the pressure to meet expectations that they THINK are on them.
2.) Too hard.
3.) "Don't like it" -- to me this is the statement that many will use when asked why they quit. Why don't they like it? It's often reason #1 and #2 above. If it's #2...we can't do much about that. Some kids weren't meant to wrestle.
IMO, in wrestling the reason a lot of kids quit is
(and I want to focus on elementary--that's where I see our club losing the most wrestlers)
1.) Fear of losing, fear of not measuring up, seeing "no chance to be at or near the top" or unreasonable expectations that they feel they should be accomplishing but can't. Where do they get these expectations? Often its a "natural" expectation that comes from themselves or from parents/coaches. Even if it doesn't come from parents/coaches, kid still FEEL that they are to be meeting these expectations. If I could coach youth wrestling over again, THAT would what I would remind kids of CONSTANTLY--- If we are working hard, and doing things in the practice room etc to get better, we have done our job. We can't control the wins and losses. We can control the preparation and effort only. If we can somehow get elementary kids to understand/buy into that train of thought, we'd lose less wrestlers. Personally, here, we lose the most kids in middle to late elementary. I can tell when kids are candidates to quit---I can see the pressure to win that they feel, and the let down/agony when they lose. And again, I want to reiterate that I think it comes from the pressure to meet expectations that they THINK are on them.
2.) Too hard.
3.) "Don't like it" -- to me this is the statement that many will use when asked why they quit. Why don't they like it? It's often reason #1 and #2 above. If it's #2...we can't do much about that. Some kids weren't meant to wrestle.
Quote from Skeeter on November 4, 2021, 9:26 amI think a lot of it comes down to parents buy in, celebrate the season, excited for practice and tournaments. Focus on effort over results! Maybe look into custom singlets or two pieces, some don’t like the uniforms.
I think a lot of it comes down to parents buy in, celebrate the season, excited for practice and tournaments. Focus on effort over results! Maybe look into custom singlets or two pieces, some don’t like the uniforms.
Quote from Mr. Grappler on November 4, 2021, 9:56 amIMO there are two reasons.
1) The ongoing trend of the one-sport athlete mentality and the people in "power" or of "influence" (i.e. parents and coaches) for the athletes encouraging the trend. How often do we hear athletes say they can't wrestle because they need to lift for football? Answer, too often. And I don't want to call out football as the only culprit because it's not, just an example.
2) Technology. For better or for worse technology is always improving/advancing and has made our lives faster and easier and this has helped created a society that wants everything right now with the least amount of effort. Well, that's not wrestling. Think about it, I'm sure we've all been trying to open a website and get frustrated when it takes five seconds to load, but we expect it in two or three. The funny, or not so funny, thing is we're talking mere seconds there and it can change our mood. Success in wrestling (and most sports) isn't instantaneous and requires too much blood, sweat and tears for the typical person to want to endure. Now we can sit here and blame things like video games, social media, YouTube, etc., but how far can that blame truly go when there is probably a bigger opportunity for kids (or anyone) these days to make a career out of being a professional gamer or YouTuber than a professional athlete. The first time I caught my nephews watching another person play a video game on YouTube I couldn't stop laughing and thinking how stupid that is (which it is) but then, is it really different from what we all do Sundays?
IMO there are two reasons.
1) The ongoing trend of the one-sport athlete mentality and the people in "power" or of "influence" (i.e. parents and coaches) for the athletes encouraging the trend. How often do we hear athletes say they can't wrestle because they need to lift for football? Answer, too often. And I don't want to call out football as the only culprit because it's not, just an example.
2) Technology. For better or for worse technology is always improving/advancing and has made our lives faster and easier and this has helped created a society that wants everything right now with the least amount of effort. Well, that's not wrestling. Think about it, I'm sure we've all been trying to open a website and get frustrated when it takes five seconds to load, but we expect it in two or three. The funny, or not so funny, thing is we're talking mere seconds there and it can change our mood. Success in wrestling (and most sports) isn't instantaneous and requires too much blood, sweat and tears for the typical person to want to endure. Now we can sit here and blame things like video games, social media, YouTube, etc., but how far can that blame truly go when there is probably a bigger opportunity for kids (or anyone) these days to make a career out of being a professional gamer or YouTuber than a professional athlete. The first time I caught my nephews watching another person play a video game on YouTube I couldn't stop laughing and thinking how stupid that is (which it is) but then, is it really different from what we all do Sundays?
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